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Monday 9 July 2012

WTF : Googlism, Agama Untuk Penyembah Google (3 Gambar)



Pernah dengar tentang Googlism? Ajaran bangang ini cuba membuktikan bahawa Google adalah Tuhan, sebagaimana kenyataan-kenyataan berikut ini: (Sila Istighfar dan mengucap Syahadah lepas baca!)

1. Google adalah sesuatu yang paling mendekati pada Maha Tahu.

2. Google ada dimana-mana dalam satu waktu.

3. Google menjawab penyembahnya (yang melakukan googling).

4. Google tidak akan pernah mati.

5. Google tidak terbatas dan terus tumbuh selamanya.

6. Google mengingat segalanya.

7. Google tidak melakukan kejahatan.

8. Google dicari lebih banyak daripada seluruh nama-nama Tuhan digabungkan.

9. Bukti kewujudan Google sangat banyak.

Kenyataan yang sungguh bangang.!! 

“Tuhan Google” ditentukan berjantina perempuan (Her). Mereka juga melakukan doa dengan cara menyanyikan lagu. Ini contohnya:

    Hail Google, full of hits.
    Our searches are with thee.
    Blessed art thou amongst search engines,
    and blessed is the fruit of thy servers.

    Holy Google, Mother of Searches.
    pray for us sinners,
    now and at the hour of our disk crash.
    Amen. 



Selain itu, pengikut ajaran ini juga mempunyai 'Rukun' tersendiri. Berikut 10 Commandments of Googlism:

Thou shalt have no other Search Engine before me, neither Yahoo nor Lycos, AltaVista nor Metacrawler. Thou shalt worship only me, and come to Google only for answers. 
 
Thou shalt not build thy own commercial-free Search Engine, for I am a jealous Engine, bringing law suits and plagues against the fathers of the children unto the third and fourth generations.

Thou shalt not use Google as a verb to mean the use of any lesser Search Engine.

Thou shalt remember each passing day and use thy time as an opportunity to gain knowledge of the unknown.

Thou shalt honor thy fellow humans, regardless of gender, sexual orientation or race, for each has invaluable experience and knowledge to contribute toward humankind.

Thou shalt not misspell whilst praying to me.

Thou shalt not hotlink

Thou shalt not plagiarize or take undue credit for other's work.

Thou shalt not use reciprocal links nor link farms, for I am a vengeful but fair engine and will diminish thy PageRank. The Google Dance shall cometh.

Thou shalt not manipulate Search Results. Search Engine Optimization is but the work of Microsoft.

 
p/s : Benda ni hanyalah spoof.. tapi ada jugak manusia bodoh yang btol2 menganut agama nih. dah nama kafir laknat. bodoh!

Sumber : Here


12 comments:

Anonymous said... Best Blogger Tips

bullshit !

Hang Lekir said... Best Blogger Tips

Wow, you have no sense of humour.

The Fakhirin said... Best Blogger Tips

Dalam byk2 kebangangan, inilah paling bangang skali..

#Masalah Seks Remaja

hidupbiarbest said... Best Blogger Tips

pelik2 je diorang ni... ni namanya agama teknologi..adoi

hidupbiarbest.blogspot.com

Unknown said... Best Blogger Tips

Google pon manusia yg buat adoii

Anonymous said... Best Blogger Tips

memanglah, patung berhala kat batu caves tu pun manusia jugak yang buat, Tak bergerak-gerak pun terpacak je kat situ.

ben xii said... Best Blogger Tips

sembah sultan pun apa kurangnya . haih meleis

Anonymous said... Best Blogger Tips

ya.. mereka mmg b*d*h!!!

Kamarul Azmi said... Best Blogger Tips

aku guna google search redtube

Anonymous said... Best Blogger Tips

sokong komen ben xii

Anonymous said... Best Blogger Tips

SYIRIK!!!!!!!!!!!!

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